What we think we deserve and what we actually get can tell two very different stories. I’ve spent time in the “I don’t deserve this box,” wasting hours I’ll never get back trying to figure out what went wrong, whose fault it was, or playing the blame game. However, during one of those introspective moments, I stumbled upon something Tony Robbins, a famous speaker and self-help guru said: “We don’t get what we deserve; we get what we tolerate.” That plain and simple truth was a wake-up call that hit me like a ton of bricks. I immediately understood what he meant, and how it played a role in my life. I realized the discrepancy between what I have and what I feel I deserve can be traced back to what I tolerate. This idea rings true for many people in one aspect of life or another.
What does this mean?
- If I feel like I got the short end of the stick, or I didn’t deserve to be treated a certain way, I stop and ask myself the following questions: What do I accept into my life and what do I continue to tolerate?
- What are the recurring patterns in my life?
- What do I continue to attract into my life, and what are the underlying reasons?
- What narrative do I tell myself to justify my actions and results?
- What are my current standards?
So, what do we deserve in life?
That’s up to you. Only you can decide what you will and will not permit. We may have different ideas about what we deserve based on internal and external influences, including our upbringing. However, the common thread between us is that if something isn’t benefitting us, we can change it. Yes, it’s easier said than done because it requires change on your part. It’s not about trying to change others; it’s about changing yourself.
How do we get what we deserve?
Forget how you got to this point! Wipe that slate clean and start fresh. First, decide what you believe you deserve, and then set up new boundaries that will deliver those results in every aspect of your life.
- Create your list of non-negotiables. This is the list you refer to when you’re teeter-tottering over decisions that could lower your standards.
- Keep your commitments and make self-promises a priority.
- Follow through by upholding your new standards.
This shift requires holding yourself to higher expectations. Once you do this, you’ll see and feel a change and begin to attract new opportunities, new experiences, and new people into your life.
Keep in mind:
- What matters is what or who adds value to your life versus what or who takes away from it.
- Your past doesn’t define your future, and your present is always changing.
- Only you can decide what your standards are and how much you’ll tolerate.
- Only you can change how and with whom you spend your time.
Maybe now is a good time to reevaluate what you tolerate. Maybe it’s time to set boundaries and raise the bar of your desired “deserve level.” As I mentioned earlier, change is difficult, but not getting what you deserve because of what you continue to put up with is even harder. In the end, what we deserve is unrelated to destiny or fate. Rather, it depends directly on what we accept and allow in our lives. Your worth isn’t set in stone. Level up your standards and watch as things start to shift.
You deserve more.
It’s Possible!
For more, go to www.gamechangercoaching.today